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Thursday, March 19, 2020

Between


The day was sunny, and fresh air filled every corner of my world. A warm light breeze blew across the freshly fallen leaves of early autumn, creating a peaceful dance underfoot. A perfect day to hang the laundry outside on the line to dry. Out of all the household tasks, this one is by far my favorite. The methodic rhythm of reaching, stretching, unruffling, and pinning each item of clothing to the line has a way of easing my muscles, and lightening my thoughts.

After all the clothes had been hung on the line with meticulous care, I stood back to absorb the pleasing sight of the clothes as they flittered in the wind, joining the leaves in their dance.

Empty laundry basket in hand I head back to the house, and on with my day. Making beds, watering plants, and of course washing the dishes.

Lunch time comes and goes, and while the boys are both happily playing in the living room I glance out the front window only to realize that the weather is turning. Dark clouds are hanging low in the northwest corner of the sky, and as I watch it becomes apparent that they will engulf the entire sky in short order. "It is going to rain", I say to myself.

It is going to rain. My clothes are on the line. MY CLOTHES ARE ON THE LINE!

Out I go, laundry basket in hand. It is not a question of if it will rain, it is a question of how much and when.

As the sky begins to darken I begin to unpin the clothes, folding them and placing them neatly in the laundry basket. A little bit of weather is no reason to rush. A clap of thunder rumbles through the air. My skin bumps and tingles reminding me of my childhood days in Minnesota, and the massive thunderstorms that would pass through our neck of the woods. These memories add an extra shiver and sense of urgency but I remind myself, this is Alaska, and storms here in the interior are nowhere near as intense as those of my childhood home. I calmly return to the task at hand.

The air is currently still, the water on the lake is undisturbed, the only visible movement around me is that of the clouds overhead. I continue to unpin the clothes and fold them neatly in the basket.

Another clap of thunder, then a flash of lightning streaks across the sky. In that moment the wind begins to gather speed, rushing through the trees and disturbing the water on the lake as if to churn up a lake monster from the depths. The clothes on the line start to flutter and tussle with each other, they tug at the line, begging the pins to grant them their freedom. The leaves on the trees strain away from their branches. My heart begins to race, and my nerves begin to jitter. My pace quickens. I no longer care if the clothes are folded, at this point if they make it into the basket without me having to chase them across the yard, it's a win.

The sky takes on the shade of midnight, and the wind rages like an angry beast, stirring the landscape into a frenzied sight. My imagination runs away to the corner where fear lives insisting I should panic.

Another clap of thunder, followed by a flash of lightning strangely transforms my nervous jitters into giddy laughter. This is no longer an alarming race against the pending rain it is a spirited game of who is the quickest. My childhood sense of competition takes over, and I laugh again, this time at the rolling sinister clouds.

“I will beat you!”, my inner child bellows into the passing gust. My laughter following close behind my challenging words.

As the last article of clothing is tossed in the basket, and all the pins stuffed into their bag, a raindrop lands on my cheek, I hurriedly make my way back to the house. Standing in the entryway, behind the glass door with the clothes safely indoors a sense of triumph washes over me. Rain drops begin to pelt against the glass, “let us in”, they holler.

“Not today!”, I say with firm resolve. Today I bested the storm. I did not allow fear or panic to take hold of my better judgment.

There is a fine line between stillness and distressing anxiety. You might be standing on the edge between these two sensations when you start to feel your heart rate increase, and your nerves begin that jittery jump underneath your skin. Now is the time to let calmness be your goal. Now is the time to laugh at the sinister clouds of worry. Shelter yourself and your loved ones from the coming storm, not out of fear but from a place of compassion.

May the coming days, weeks, and months be a time of understanding, connection, bonding, and sharing the love with those you love.

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